Psychic Mystic Madam Misty Murky Merkel
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Anyway, I predict that April will be a good month for commodities. Butter will be something people should stock up on because May is going to be a big month for deep-fat fried butter. Oh, is that so good! I think I'll fry some butter as soon as I'm done with this column. You know it might be a good idea to stock up on plastic baskets to drop into the deep fat fryer. I usually go through four or five plastic baskets every time I make deep fat fried butter.
I also predict for April a real increase in government deportations. Now, even though I was born in Kalamazoo Michigan I've been picked up and deported 14 times. I was deported twice to Mexico, twice to Canada, once to New Zealand and nine times to Ohio. The funny thing is is that I got back to Michigan really easy from all my destinations except for Ohio. The machine gunner nests and landmine fields down along the Michigan-Ohio border are really had to navigate through. The last time I crossed that border I thought I got nicked by a bullet and lost part of my left ear but luckily, it was just an earring that got shot out but, boy did it hurt. I'm just glad it was a clip-on and came off real easy. Still, it hurt a lot.