Madam Misty Merkel
Northern Michigan is preparing for the 4th of July but I am preparing for a real revelation. It seems that a certain person is trying to get through from the other side in order to visit me and I believe it might be Elvis. I think he wants to go dancing with me again. The last time he came through was when I tried to contact Michael Jackson. Anyway, Elvis showed up at my trailer and took over the body of this heavy set boy I know named Gerrard. Now Gerrard is none too pleasing to look at but with Elvis’s personality it was inevitable that we would go out on a date and go dancing.
I will tell you now that dancing with the king was wonderful. I didn’t even recognize that it was Gerrard’s body that I was dancing with because the king himself is beyond worldly things like looks and is in fact, just a plain phantom of sheer glamour.
Anyway, I predict that the month of July will be a fairly nasty month in terms of weather, politics and money so, just hang tight because the king is coming back and he dresses up well in any fashion and in any times. And, just always remember “For my darling I love you and I always will.”