IF YOU WANT TO DOOMSCROOL, THIS IS THE PLACE FOR YOU

 By Psychic Madam Mystic Misty Murky Merkel

Associate Contributing Psychic News Correspondent

Humor News Nuts Online Publications 

Sorry people, but I have had a hard job posting anything anywhere.  It seems like every time I get ready to post, I get a knock at the door, and then I'm deported again.  In fact, I've been deported 16 times, so far this year; mostly to Ohio.  I was deported six times to Myrtle Beach and twice to Grand Rapids. 

 Ohio is getting really hard to escape from, because of the razor wire and machine gun nests they've put along the Ohio border with Michigan.  I always avoid all that by hiring a  Great Lakes Mariner, to sneak into Michigan, the state I love and I which I was born .

Grand Rapids is a terrible place to be reported, because so many people go into that city, and can never find a way out.  It's like you stark walking in one direction, and six days later, you realise you haven't moved at all.  I heard that one time President Gerald Ford went to Grand Rapids, and was never seen again.  Scary place, Grand Rapids.

In terms of  all the worry and turmoil going on in the world, before you dampen your socks and shoes, or soil your new white slacks, chill out a moment.  It's still 2025, and our world won't be completely destroyed until 2026.  You've still have months to hold your loved ones close, unless they smell.  Then, maybe just email them more often.  Maybe use some cute emoji to cheer them up.  Take their mind off the impending misery and doom, that everyone on this planet will experience in 2026.

My parents, myself and my two sisters, Twisty and Christy, are working on finding our way off this death, doomed rock, and back to our invisible mountain, that floats over the earth.  The mountain we call, our ancestral home.  Pretty much everyone, whose species did not originate on this planet, are putting an egg in their shoe, and their going to beat it.  No one wants to live on this planet anymore, especially if they're going to die. 

Of course, people whose ancestors are from this world, have the possibility of escaping planet Earth for Mars, but you will need to pay for the trip.  Also, don't drink the water on Mars, and if you have breathing problems, do not breath the air.  

So, the world is not as bad as you think, if you're reading this blog in 2025.  If you're reading this blog in 2026, Get Off Of Planet Earth!  Find another planet, any planet to live on.  There may still be room on spaceships headed to Mars. If you want your gene pool to keep survive, do whatever it takes to get off this doomed, little rock.  Bye, bye.

Misty💃