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Tuesday, December 31, 2024

NORTHERN MICHIGAN'S TRAILER PARK PSYCHIC PREDICTS 2025, AND BEYOND

By Psychic Madam Misty Murky Merkel

Michigan's Backwoods Backwards Trailer Park Psychic

Part-time Associate Assistant Contributing Writer Commenter

Humor News Nuts Online Publications And Septic Tank Services


Congratulations.  If you're reading this, then you probably survived 2024.  What a year of dangers and destruction. I'm mostly referring to the trailer park down the road from mine, that got hit by that tornado.  That was just plain bad luck.  I mean, what are the odds of a tornado hitting a trailer park? That's a really nice trailer park.  The trailers still have floors in them, and the indoor plumbing, actually works.💩🙈

That trailer park is mainly for really rich people.  The lot rent is hundreds of dollars each month, whereas the lot rent in my park is only $22.00 every other week.  It's still a lot of money.  Especially, if you're dependent on selling your psychic abilities to the public.  Believe it or not, sometimes I go for several weeks without making any money at all.🙎♥

I've been trying to branch out to doing piercings and tattoos, but I have to wait for the lawsuits to be settled first, before I can continue that business.  There's also the matter of waiting to hear from the county prosecutors office.  I feel good about that one.  It's been at least a week, since the Sheriff's office has had a deputy parked in front of my trailer. I know from experience, that's usually a good sign.🚔

Anyway, the trailer park down the road was almost completely destroyed by the tornado.  FEMA even showed up with disaster relief, but they all pulled into my trailer park.  It was nice for a while, before they found out they were at the wrong place. The free boxes of food and toilet paper will come in handy.  Some residents have been here so long, they've forgotten what toilet paper is used for.  They thought it was a form of soft shell tacos that are sold on a roll. 🌮 Oh, boy.🤦

So much for 2024.  🎉🎉🎉

I have good news and bad news for 2025 and beyond. The good news is that all of you reading this article right now, will probably be here one year from now.  The bad news is that none of you, reading this article right now, should make severe sacrifices in 2025, to save money for a nice vacation in 2026.🙀  I'm going to be living in the present.🙈🙉🙊  Maybe you should too.👩

HAPPY NEW YEAR'S EVE EVERYBODY🙋



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