MY PREDICTIONS FOR JUNE

By Mystic Madam Misty (Murky) Merkel

Psychic Phenomenon Investigator And Reporter 

Executive Associate Staff Writer

Humor News Nuts Publications

 I predict people will send me some foul wishes, because gas prices are going higher.  Today I walked into a DG store to get a balloon for my friend, Frosty Friedea.  Usually the balloons are like six bucks but they wanted $14 for a cheap, "Happy Birthday" balloon. I couldn't pay that much so I asked if they might have some clearance Valintines, Christmas or 2021 New Years balloons.  The store clerk said they did, but it would still cost $14.99. I asked them why and she explained that the price was high because there was a shortage of helium gas.  

I was perplexed. What would I get my friend for her birthday.  I told the clerk I only only had $6.43 and I wanted something nice. The clerk said, " Aren't you that psychic lady on the internet that's always chasing off ghosts or communicating with aliens?"

"Yes, " I said, "I am Madam Mystic Misty Merkel, and I am famous."

"You seem a bit in the bag Madam Misty.  Say, I've got something you can have to give to your friend." Then the nice clerk bent way over and lifted up a little rabbit's foot and set it on the counter.  It was a beautiful furry foot with a long leather strap. "Since you're a madam or mystic or something, I bet you'll appreciate the significance of this little furry fella.  It's a rabbit's foot for good luck."

I was so excited.  I got a free present for Frieda, so I lit off for home.  When I got back to my trailer I immediately found a box, scissors, tape and a pretty napkin to wrap up my gift. I did have a major problem though.  When I pulled the rabbit's foot out of my pocket I noticed it had a couple of little eyes. It also had ears, a mouth and the leather string was actually a long mousey tail.  It seems I had been more than a bit in the bag when I was at the DG store.  The clerk had given me a dead mouse she had steped on and apparently, decided to get ridof it by giving it away.  

That's the last time I will go to that store for a rabbit's foot.  After all, a dead mouse is so gross. Who'd carry around the remains of a dead animal in their pocket?🐁

One more prediction for June.  Those of you with smelly feet, make sure you wash and deodorize your feet, socks and shoes everyday, because your feet will be extra smelly during  the month of June.

🌈🌈🌈🌈🌈HAPPY PRIDE🌈🌈🌈🌈🌈

Madam Misty